A Mother's Wish

The past two weeks have just been a whirlwind of many things amazing.

I ran six miles yesterday...a slow and labored six miles.  I didn't seem to care about my pace, about the rain, or about the ups and downs of the road.  I wanted to be out there; it was my choice.  I occasionally found it hard to believe that I ran a marathon just two weeks prior.  It was during the race that I realized I had been searching for 'something' that honestly wasn't the right thing.  What I had been searching for all along was right in front of me.  

The weather has been warmer and the colorful life that is spring is all around.  When I pick up my girls at their Dad's I'm slightly miffed at the beauty of all the blooming flowers in his yard.  I planted those flowers; some of them with the girls.  I wanted them because they were mine.  But I reframed; they weren't meant to be mine all along.  They were just a place holder in time.  What i need is right in front of me.  

In the same vein, I have been struggling for years to be the kind of person my Mom thinks I should be.  I have been striving for some sort of approval, some positive acknowledgement, some type of respect. I've since retired from the hunt and, instead, established boundaries with her - an approach that has literally taken DECADES.  

Yesterday, on Mother's Day, she told me that I am a strong person; I am determined and go after what I want.  She said it in such a way that struck me - carefully and with pride.

Birds of a Feather

Everything I need is right in front of me.  Sometimes, I guess for all of us, it takes time to realize that.  

I wish for my daughters that they strive for the stars, but not forget the ground on which they plant their feet.  

My First Running Partners