On Boston

For me...

Racing to BQ (Boston qualifier) was a goal two years ago.  Looking back on the race that fractured my character is difficult.  I can honestly see myself, back then, as if on a trail, coming upon a junction - so many ways to go, and yet the path I chose looked the least suspect, but proved to be the most challenging.  

After running NYC in 2014, I wanted a challenge; I wanted to qualify for Boston.  On the surface I knew what it would take, not realizing that it would leave me broke.  I was for damn sure that I could do it...even through a hot summer of training and a serious bonk on a 3 hour run (and only 50 calories to sustain myself).  How could I not do it?  But alas, the wheels came off the bus during the race and I just crumbled.  If you know me well, you have the Cliff Notes version of the story.

My infamous training run bonk.

I brushed myself off a few months later and thought that the NJM could be my shot.  Leading up to race day, I took my coach's advice and push hopes of a BQ aside.  We needed me to just find confidence.  We needed me just to believe in the training.  I needed to believe in me.  Amidst hurricane like winds, chilly temps, and a downpour, I focused on a strong race and, Goddamn it, I PR'd minutes from my BQ without a care.  I accomplished the goal.  I believed.

This year, I gained another 5 minutes to a qualifying time, which sounds great, only if I didn't gain 20-ish pounds during my depression.  My training, my journey, is to rebuild myself. BQ...maybe one day, but that is no longer the focus.  I needed to fail so I could come back from the dead...

Harder, better, faster, stronger.